It is said that when you get past the age of needing to be parented, or reined in, or something, you have to do it to yourself, right?
Wellll, that's kinda where I'm at, in this moment of time.
Because damn it, I have an idea for another blog. Yeah, my creative brain just cannot imagine my universe without another blog.
And the Moon in Capricorn is saying, "Whoa, Horse-Woman (my Chinese astrology sign is Horse and my Ascendant is Sagittarius. Go figure). You need to corral your productivity to the ones you've got."
I know this is entirely true, but what do you do when your brain and smart-arse self disagree with this level of discipline and want to go overboard anyway, just to thumb their noses at any kind of finger-wagging "authority," even if that authority supposedly comes from within.
Supposedly.
"All right," Cappy Moon relents. "Create the new blog, but get on a routine of posting to the other blogs first, and see if you can handle the load."
But I still have to ask myself why I want to create another blog when I've got others I have yet to really keep up with. Is it just the constant urge to create, all the crazy-arse ideas I've got floating about in my head that desire to be expressed?
Haha...Madonna's old song "Express Yourself" just popped into my head.
So, what? Now I gotta create another freakin' blog just to let off some freakin' steam, because I've got a big part of me that is so freakin' wound up and tense that it's gotta crack snarky jokes just to relieve tension?
Maybe...but I'm thinking better of it because maybe meditation and just plain working on my music or whatever might help relieve some of the inner turmoil.
Or all that might just be a band-aid. Who the hell knows? The only way to know is to try out that first idea before getting all impulsive like I usually am.
In all truth, maybe I just need to get all Zen like the character "Chien-Po" from "Mulan" and say, "Relax and chant with me..." Sounds like a pretty nice invitation, actually. I knew there was a reason I liked that character, as secondary as he was.
Then there's the roaring side of me that just wants to let out a cathartic scream of utter frustration because she's too tightly wound from feeling limited in any way. There is a huge difference between discipline-by-choice and feeling forced to do things another person's way just because they think they have all the freakin' answers. I will accept someone else's tutelage if I feel it's right for me. If I don't think it's right for me, and they still force their ideas on me, fuhgeddaboudit!
Anyway, I'm gonna cut off this ramble before it gets entirely out of hand.
Pax Felinum,
Kat ^.^
Friday, May 8, 2015
Thursday, April 30, 2015
Books...Glorious Books!
If you ever happen to come to Iowa, be sure to check out the Ames Public Library.
Of all the big-city libraries I have been in, it is one of the best. Granted, it doesn't have a large Wicca/Pagan section like the Iowa City library does, but that simply indicates the demographic of Ames. It's a slightly smaller college town, so it is not quite as diverse. And perhaps the library's budget is a tad smaller. Besides, they essentially just finished building a brand new library--which is WAY bigger than the original, so whatever bills they have to pay come before expanding the collection.
Besides, if I want Pagan-ish stuff, I can always save up and go to the bookstore, or order from OneSpirit. Or better yet, simply do a proper search on the web for blogs, which are often more up-to-date than actual books. It just depends on what I need.
In any case, I love the Ames library. Their collection's expanded considerably, for both fiction and non-fiction. Mom wasn't too happy that they'd put all the fiction together instead of separating by genre, the way they used to. But for some reason, that doesn't concern me, since I haven't read fiction in a good while, unless it's a romance book from Wal-Mart. (Yeah, I know...really educational, right? More like under [or on!] the table sex ed! ;-) To make myself feel less "ashamed" about it, I just call them "books for stirring the second and fourth chakras," because that's about what those books target. Mom has judgements galore about them, but she doesn't have to read 'em if she doesn't want to.)
The health and fitness section is larger than I remember it, as is the spirituality section. The productivity-time-management/career section is ginormous! And they've expanded the computer programming section. As for foreign language???? Let's put it this way: there are scads of materials for learning French, Italian, Spanish, Chinese, Japanese, even Croatian, Czech, Hebrew, Russian, even some of the Scandinavian languages. But as before, only one small entry for learning the one Celtic language on file: Irish. *sighs* They say it's a dying language, as is Welsh and there are people on the west coast of Ireland and in Wales trying to keep their respective languages preserved. I know in Scotland that their form of Gaelic is still alive because I watched a documentary on Irish dancing and the banner they had in the auditorium for the dancing championship was in both English and Gaelic. And I am as drawn to Gaelic and Welsh as I am to French, so...yeah. And yes, I would love to learn Welsh!
Their new computer-based search system is not quite as good as the old one, actually. There are some bugs to work out. They have monitors hung on posts, which is good, except I liked the old system where the computers were in study-desk-like tables, with plenty of writing surface. I had with me a notebook half again the depth of the new tiny "desks." And they only have the call numbers on the sides of the shelves, with no verbal labels denoting which section is which. Marshalltown's library scores a little higher there, but maybe the call-number situation at Ames is temporary. *shrugs* I may make a mention of the computer issues to the clerks at the info desk next time I'm there. But all in all, I was still able to get the call-number sections written down for the topics I wanted, including jewelry-making and beading, which I didn't get to, but it won't be long.
I had to get a new card, since they put in a completely new card system, which is fine. It allowed me to start fresh since I hadn't checked out books from the Ames library for a long time. As for the computer/wi-fi situation? It's incredible! There are at least four good tables with awesome-looking lamps, and there are USB and electrical plug-in stations directly on the tables, making it WAY more convenient to plug in laptops. This will make getting up to go to Ames with Pop a lot more convenient and enjoyable, since I'll be able to take my laptop with me.
Plus, on some of the tables, there are e-reader stations, making it easier to check out e-books and read them there at the library. I may have to ask some questions about how to access the e-books and whatnot, especially if I can download them to my computer, since I don't have a tablet.
And oh...the new reading chairs upstairs are awesome!!! I didn't sit in any of them, but they look very comfy! Far more comfy than the chairs at my home town library. Sorry, Big M, but your chair cushions need upgrading. :P
Funny thing about the spirituality section at the Ames library is that I really didn't see any books on Tarot. I may have to look a bit harder, and use the search function, but then again, I wasn't specifically looking for books on Tarot this time around. Since I've got a new bookmark that gives me the APL URL, I can do a search later.
Anyway, it's time to sign off and get to work on eBay stuff, since I spent the afternoon and evening in Ames with my parents.
Pax Felinum,
Kat ^.^
Of all the big-city libraries I have been in, it is one of the best. Granted, it doesn't have a large Wicca/Pagan section like the Iowa City library does, but that simply indicates the demographic of Ames. It's a slightly smaller college town, so it is not quite as diverse. And perhaps the library's budget is a tad smaller. Besides, they essentially just finished building a brand new library--which is WAY bigger than the original, so whatever bills they have to pay come before expanding the collection.
Besides, if I want Pagan-ish stuff, I can always save up and go to the bookstore, or order from OneSpirit. Or better yet, simply do a proper search on the web for blogs, which are often more up-to-date than actual books. It just depends on what I need.
In any case, I love the Ames library. Their collection's expanded considerably, for both fiction and non-fiction. Mom wasn't too happy that they'd put all the fiction together instead of separating by genre, the way they used to. But for some reason, that doesn't concern me, since I haven't read fiction in a good while, unless it's a romance book from Wal-Mart. (Yeah, I know...really educational, right? More like under [or on!] the table sex ed! ;-) To make myself feel less "ashamed" about it, I just call them "books for stirring the second and fourth chakras," because that's about what those books target. Mom has judgements galore about them, but she doesn't have to read 'em if she doesn't want to.)
The health and fitness section is larger than I remember it, as is the spirituality section. The productivity-time-management/career section is ginormous! And they've expanded the computer programming section. As for foreign language???? Let's put it this way: there are scads of materials for learning French, Italian, Spanish, Chinese, Japanese, even Croatian, Czech, Hebrew, Russian, even some of the Scandinavian languages. But as before, only one small entry for learning the one Celtic language on file: Irish. *sighs* They say it's a dying language, as is Welsh and there are people on the west coast of Ireland and in Wales trying to keep their respective languages preserved. I know in Scotland that their form of Gaelic is still alive because I watched a documentary on Irish dancing and the banner they had in the auditorium for the dancing championship was in both English and Gaelic. And I am as drawn to Gaelic and Welsh as I am to French, so...yeah. And yes, I would love to learn Welsh!
Their new computer-based search system is not quite as good as the old one, actually. There are some bugs to work out. They have monitors hung on posts, which is good, except I liked the old system where the computers were in study-desk-like tables, with plenty of writing surface. I had with me a notebook half again the depth of the new tiny "desks." And they only have the call numbers on the sides of the shelves, with no verbal labels denoting which section is which. Marshalltown's library scores a little higher there, but maybe the call-number situation at Ames is temporary. *shrugs* I may make a mention of the computer issues to the clerks at the info desk next time I'm there. But all in all, I was still able to get the call-number sections written down for the topics I wanted, including jewelry-making and beading, which I didn't get to, but it won't be long.
I had to get a new card, since they put in a completely new card system, which is fine. It allowed me to start fresh since I hadn't checked out books from the Ames library for a long time. As for the computer/wi-fi situation? It's incredible! There are at least four good tables with awesome-looking lamps, and there are USB and electrical plug-in stations directly on the tables, making it WAY more convenient to plug in laptops. This will make getting up to go to Ames with Pop a lot more convenient and enjoyable, since I'll be able to take my laptop with me.
Plus, on some of the tables, there are e-reader stations, making it easier to check out e-books and read them there at the library. I may have to ask some questions about how to access the e-books and whatnot, especially if I can download them to my computer, since I don't have a tablet.
And oh...the new reading chairs upstairs are awesome!!! I didn't sit in any of them, but they look very comfy! Far more comfy than the chairs at my home town library. Sorry, Big M, but your chair cushions need upgrading. :P
Funny thing about the spirituality section at the Ames library is that I really didn't see any books on Tarot. I may have to look a bit harder, and use the search function, but then again, I wasn't specifically looking for books on Tarot this time around. Since I've got a new bookmark that gives me the APL URL, I can do a search later.
Anyway, it's time to sign off and get to work on eBay stuff, since I spent the afternoon and evening in Ames with my parents.
Pax Felinum,
Kat ^.^
Wednesday, April 22, 2015
Productivity
Every now and then, I get a burst of "productivity-itis," where I feel inspired to a greater or lesser degree to sort out my life. And since I have both Firefox on my computer and Google Play apps (on my Android) at my disposal, I figure there is just no bleepin' excuse for me to not get my life under control...rein in my procrastination tendencies and sort out all the things I want to do.
Because I'll admit it--I am part Pisces. (Born on the Pisces-Aries cusp, that is.) I admit that when I am overwhelmed, I get stressed. When I get stressed, I wanna escape someplace or into something that has nothing to do with what needs to be done. A lot of the time, it's TV and/or YouTube videos. Other times, it's my fan-fic, or something else that's caught my eyes and ears, especially if it's on Facebook.
But when my "productivity-itis" decides to come home to roost in my psyche, I get all pumped up--especially since I know there are helpful Android apps and Firefox extensions to help me build good productivity habits.
The thing I have to get past is this old "tape" of "you never stick to anything" or "you don't have enough 'stick-to-itiveness.'" This is a more or less "well-meaning" observation from good ol' Mom. Yes, she's telling the truth. I have had troubles sticking to things once I start. I do not know why this is, other than I'm an Aries, a cardinal sign: great for getting things going, but supposedly not so great at continuing projects.
Well, like the Sagittarius ascendant I have, I am going to play shaman a bit, and put on the mask of someone who can stick to things and see them through to completion. I am going to channel this month's Taurean energy, connect it with my Chiron in Taurus and break this spell of "she has no discipline" that's also gone hand in hand with the "stick-to-itiveness."
I just got the notion of pairing this with my Scorpio placement. Uranus in Scorpio. Transformation through Different Perspectives. Yes, this will be powerful energy to work with indeed! Very powerful alchemy!
But of course, the writer part of me--both Gemini and Libra--just couldn't help putting her oar in and say "You can blog about this!" My Virgo side says, "Keep track of the results of your experiments in a physical notebook--but make the notebook cheap." So I went and found a cheap composition book for a mere 99 cents at Goodwill. My Virgo self LOVES Goodwill.
Then BOTH my Taurus and Virgo sides are after me to monetize the blogging of my journey, results, etc, just so I'm not missing out on potential income streams.
But the way I see it, it's all good. Now...onto my quest for the productivity tools that will make my "toolbox" the best toolbox for me. :-)
Pax Felinum.
Kat ^.^
Because I'll admit it--I am part Pisces. (Born on the Pisces-Aries cusp, that is.) I admit that when I am overwhelmed, I get stressed. When I get stressed, I wanna escape someplace or into something that has nothing to do with what needs to be done. A lot of the time, it's TV and/or YouTube videos. Other times, it's my fan-fic, or something else that's caught my eyes and ears, especially if it's on Facebook.
But when my "productivity-itis" decides to come home to roost in my psyche, I get all pumped up--especially since I know there are helpful Android apps and Firefox extensions to help me build good productivity habits.
The thing I have to get past is this old "tape" of "you never stick to anything" or "you don't have enough 'stick-to-itiveness.'" This is a more or less "well-meaning" observation from good ol' Mom. Yes, she's telling the truth. I have had troubles sticking to things once I start. I do not know why this is, other than I'm an Aries, a cardinal sign: great for getting things going, but supposedly not so great at continuing projects.
Well, like the Sagittarius ascendant I have, I am going to play shaman a bit, and put on the mask of someone who can stick to things and see them through to completion. I am going to channel this month's Taurean energy, connect it with my Chiron in Taurus and break this spell of "she has no discipline" that's also gone hand in hand with the "stick-to-itiveness."
I just got the notion of pairing this with my Scorpio placement. Uranus in Scorpio. Transformation through Different Perspectives. Yes, this will be powerful energy to work with indeed! Very powerful alchemy!
But of course, the writer part of me--both Gemini and Libra--just couldn't help putting her oar in and say "You can blog about this!" My Virgo side says, "Keep track of the results of your experiments in a physical notebook--but make the notebook cheap." So I went and found a cheap composition book for a mere 99 cents at Goodwill. My Virgo self LOVES Goodwill.
Then BOTH my Taurus and Virgo sides are after me to monetize the blogging of my journey, results, etc, just so I'm not missing out on potential income streams.
But the way I see it, it's all good. Now...onto my quest for the productivity tools that will make my "toolbox" the best toolbox for me. :-)
Pax Felinum.
Kat ^.^
Thursday, April 16, 2015
When The Goin' Gets Tough...
I am currently experiencing a feeling similar to the way I felt back in high school, due to collective financial issues.
I lost my job, so my parents are having to cover some of my expenses. This alone makes me feel guilty in a variety of ways.
But what makes me feel really bad about it is Mom is likely not going to be able to go to Indiana for my cousin's wedding. She's also worried about my dad's ability to drive well, esp. at night. And he's supposed to be officiating!
Like I said, I'm currently experiencing a feeling similar to how I felt in high school:
I am tired of having to ask my parents for money...but for a different reason this time around.
And the angels are backing me up, pushing me into the second part of the phrase..."When the goin' gets tough...the tough get goin'!" The Life Purpose reading I did before coming to the library is proof of it--featuring TWO cards that point me towards what I need to do.
And I am determined to be much less of a burden--hopefully never--to my parents from this point on. Because that's how I feel. I know my dad tries to say I'm not, but I know I am. I can no longer truly depend on my Earthly dad and mom...I'm 37 years old for pete's sake.
It's time to let my Heavenly Mother-Father Source and the angels take over and guide me to where I need to be so my parents don't feel the pinch beyond my dad's funky spending habits. My dad didn't *have to* buy the stand and carrying case for my new keyboard. But he did. All he really had to get was the AC cord and I would have been all set.
This situation is pushing me into where I need to--and want to--go. Sure I would rather go to Ames to work on my blogs and such, just because they're open later than the library is. But...I'll just need to get up a lot earlier so I can spend as much time at the library as I need to. It's the one way I can get work done without spending a ton of money--or having my work interrupted. And I will need to work out some sort of schedule to balance domestic and business tasks, among other things.
So yeah...that's the long and the short of it.
Now...to the business of getting down to business! :-D
I lost my job, so my parents are having to cover some of my expenses. This alone makes me feel guilty in a variety of ways.
But what makes me feel really bad about it is Mom is likely not going to be able to go to Indiana for my cousin's wedding. She's also worried about my dad's ability to drive well, esp. at night. And he's supposed to be officiating!
Like I said, I'm currently experiencing a feeling similar to how I felt in high school:
I am tired of having to ask my parents for money...but for a different reason this time around.
And the angels are backing me up, pushing me into the second part of the phrase..."When the goin' gets tough...the tough get goin'!" The Life Purpose reading I did before coming to the library is proof of it--featuring TWO cards that point me towards what I need to do.
And I am determined to be much less of a burden--hopefully never--to my parents from this point on. Because that's how I feel. I know my dad tries to say I'm not, but I know I am. I can no longer truly depend on my Earthly dad and mom...I'm 37 years old for pete's sake.
It's time to let my Heavenly Mother-Father Source and the angels take over and guide me to where I need to be so my parents don't feel the pinch beyond my dad's funky spending habits. My dad didn't *have to* buy the stand and carrying case for my new keyboard. But he did. All he really had to get was the AC cord and I would have been all set.
This situation is pushing me into where I need to--and want to--go. Sure I would rather go to Ames to work on my blogs and such, just because they're open later than the library is. But...I'll just need to get up a lot earlier so I can spend as much time at the library as I need to. It's the one way I can get work done without spending a ton of money--or having my work interrupted. And I will need to work out some sort of schedule to balance domestic and business tasks, among other things.
So yeah...that's the long and the short of it.
Now...to the business of getting down to business! :-D
Monday, March 30, 2015
Wild & Crazy
I did something wild and crazy the other day.
"Now that's not news," I hear you say. "You're always kinda that way."
Well, it's wild and crazy in the sense that I took a step forward into what I feel might be the beginning of the metaphysical career my soul's been pushing me towards.
Oh, not that I am going to give up music. Music is the core of who I am. And since I believe everything is connected, music is going to be a huge facet of the work I'm meant to do. It's not just going to be a side hobby.
The wild and crazy thing I did on Saturday night was a pure exercise in trusting my intuition, going with how I felt about things.
A friend of mine recommended I sign up as a reader on Keen.com. Well, I took a deeper look at what that entails as far as being available for readings, how I'd get paid, and so on. There was a huge list of FAQ's about being an advisor over there, and my time at the book store was running short enough that I just didn't have time to be all Hermione Granger about it.
But what I did read left me feeling extraordinarily intimidated. I knew I wasn't ready for what goes on. I've only really got three readings under my belt as far as reading for others is concerned. Three readings is not that firm a foundation for getting paid as an intuitive advisor.
I'm just not that confident yet, and I really don't have specific qualifications to back me up except that my intuition's getting sharper. There are Doreen Virtue's courses that DO sound like loads of fun. But I need to get the money together for those, yet.
So...I did the next best thing, which felt a little more comfortable, a little less intimidating: I went over to the Facebook page for Doreen Virtue's Angel Therapy group and posted a message.
The response was just as wild and crazy as the actual step I took to post the message! Just over 70 reading requests came through, 45 of those coming through just in the time between posting the message and driving home from the bookstore! To say I am both thrilled and overwhelmed is an understatement.
I messaged my sister-friend Karma about it, and I couldn't tell who was more over the moon about it--me or her--because she's been working with me to help me overcome some stuff on a metaphysical level that really can't be touched with regular psychotherapy. But this should tell her that her work with me has been a success...and it tells me that I've progressed further than I originally would have thought.
Well, since I've got nine priority readings to do, as well as post more stuff on eBay, I'd best get to bed!
Pax Felinum,
Kat ^.^
"Now that's not news," I hear you say. "You're always kinda that way."
Well, it's wild and crazy in the sense that I took a step forward into what I feel might be the beginning of the metaphysical career my soul's been pushing me towards.
Oh, not that I am going to give up music. Music is the core of who I am. And since I believe everything is connected, music is going to be a huge facet of the work I'm meant to do. It's not just going to be a side hobby.
The wild and crazy thing I did on Saturday night was a pure exercise in trusting my intuition, going with how I felt about things.
A friend of mine recommended I sign up as a reader on Keen.com. Well, I took a deeper look at what that entails as far as being available for readings, how I'd get paid, and so on. There was a huge list of FAQ's about being an advisor over there, and my time at the book store was running short enough that I just didn't have time to be all Hermione Granger about it.
But what I did read left me feeling extraordinarily intimidated. I knew I wasn't ready for what goes on. I've only really got three readings under my belt as far as reading for others is concerned. Three readings is not that firm a foundation for getting paid as an intuitive advisor.
I'm just not that confident yet, and I really don't have specific qualifications to back me up except that my intuition's getting sharper. There are Doreen Virtue's courses that DO sound like loads of fun. But I need to get the money together for those, yet.
So...I did the next best thing, which felt a little more comfortable, a little less intimidating: I went over to the Facebook page for Doreen Virtue's Angel Therapy group and posted a message.
The response was just as wild and crazy as the actual step I took to post the message! Just over 70 reading requests came through, 45 of those coming through just in the time between posting the message and driving home from the bookstore! To say I am both thrilled and overwhelmed is an understatement.
I messaged my sister-friend Karma about it, and I couldn't tell who was more over the moon about it--me or her--because she's been working with me to help me overcome some stuff on a metaphysical level that really can't be touched with regular psychotherapy. But this should tell her that her work with me has been a success...and it tells me that I've progressed further than I originally would have thought.
Well, since I've got nine priority readings to do, as well as post more stuff on eBay, I'd best get to bed!
Pax Felinum,
Kat ^.^
Thursday, March 26, 2015
Waking Up To Fun
One of the things I was thinking about was how I worry sometimes about how I am going to get things done in a day. Part of it is worry, part of it is excitement about all the enjoyable things I want to do--and I want to do everything in one day.
But then I got this idea in my head that both soothed the worry, and reminded me of one of the greatest joys about being a kid. It's actually kind of a painful joy.
It's the joy of "What are we doing tomorrow?"
Ironically, it's that kind of "I can't wait till tomorrow" feeling that makes me want to do everything right now, today, because what I have in my head that's so enjoyable for me gets my engines going.
But it's that excitement that also burns me out, gets me distracted and creates organizational hell for myself. Because for me, sometimes everything seems important right now, it's burning a hole in my brain if I don't act on things now,
and that's just me putting pressure on myself because all the things I want to do right now seem like so much fun, usually.
You can see where this is going. :P
So my wiser, adult self has to remind my inner kid that anticipation is truly half the fun of planning, setting aside certain activities for certain days instead of thinking we have to do it all today, even if we want to do it all today.
But then I feel like if I plan too loosely, I get distracted by the truly non-essential things that pull me away from the truly fun, creative stuff that brings me that joy.
So, I think a balance has to be struck between the fun things that I consider essential and the fun things that are not-so-essential.
And the key to that balance just might lie in the concept of "waking up to fun." Waking up every day and asking, "What kind of fun, creative things are on my list?" And then whatever doesn't get done goes on the next day's list without any self-abuse, without any shame. Because those negative vibes just ruin it for me. I've had enough shame dumped on me, teaching me to dump it on myself. I am so done with that way of thinking, that way of living, because it gets me absolutely nowhere.
It's time to wake up to how fun life can really be, if the perspective of fun and joy is held in the soul, instead of "Ugh, we gotta do this, and this, and that, there's not all the time in the world, gotta rush, rush, rush or else there's gonna be hell to pay," and so on. I am so done with that negative vibe. So done with that hamster wheel of unhappiness. My inner hamsters are starting to rebel. Their wheels are squeakier than they are, and they've pretty much formed a union that says "We want more fun thoughts! If we're gonna work for you, we want fun wheels to spin! Fun wheels get more creative work done. Which would you rather look at--happy, multicolored wheels that create lots of happy party balloons, or sad, creaky, rusty wheels that only churn out sad, shame-filled balloons, and only a few at a time?"
My inner kid's like, "Happy balloons!"
Smart kid!
Pax Felinum,
Kat ^.^
But then I got this idea in my head that both soothed the worry, and reminded me of one of the greatest joys about being a kid. It's actually kind of a painful joy.
It's the joy of "What are we doing tomorrow?"
Ironically, it's that kind of "I can't wait till tomorrow" feeling that makes me want to do everything right now, today, because what I have in my head that's so enjoyable for me gets my engines going.
But it's that excitement that also burns me out, gets me distracted and creates organizational hell for myself. Because for me, sometimes everything seems important right now, it's burning a hole in my brain if I don't act on things now,
and that's just me putting pressure on myself because all the things I want to do right now seem like so much fun, usually.
You can see where this is going. :P
So my wiser, adult self has to remind my inner kid that anticipation is truly half the fun of planning, setting aside certain activities for certain days instead of thinking we have to do it all today, even if we want to do it all today.
But then I feel like if I plan too loosely, I get distracted by the truly non-essential things that pull me away from the truly fun, creative stuff that brings me that joy.
So, I think a balance has to be struck between the fun things that I consider essential and the fun things that are not-so-essential.
And the key to that balance just might lie in the concept of "waking up to fun." Waking up every day and asking, "What kind of fun, creative things are on my list?" And then whatever doesn't get done goes on the next day's list without any self-abuse, without any shame. Because those negative vibes just ruin it for me. I've had enough shame dumped on me, teaching me to dump it on myself. I am so done with that way of thinking, that way of living, because it gets me absolutely nowhere.
It's time to wake up to how fun life can really be, if the perspective of fun and joy is held in the soul, instead of "Ugh, we gotta do this, and this, and that, there's not all the time in the world, gotta rush, rush, rush or else there's gonna be hell to pay," and so on. I am so done with that negative vibe. So done with that hamster wheel of unhappiness. My inner hamsters are starting to rebel. Their wheels are squeakier than they are, and they've pretty much formed a union that says "We want more fun thoughts! If we're gonna work for you, we want fun wheels to spin! Fun wheels get more creative work done. Which would you rather look at--happy, multicolored wheels that create lots of happy party balloons, or sad, creaky, rusty wheels that only churn out sad, shame-filled balloons, and only a few at a time?"
My inner kid's like, "Happy balloons!"
Smart kid!
Pax Felinum,
Kat ^.^
The Reason For This Blog...
The reason I created this blog is the following:
"The heart has its reasons, of which reason knows nothing." -- Blaise Pascal.
I would have written that in the original French, but since it is not likely many folks who see this post would be able to read the language, I still would have had to provide a translation...so what would have been the point, other than I simply like to read stuff in languages other than my native English? :P
For fun, you ask? Yeah, pretty much.
Does reason know anything of fun? I'm beginning to doubt that.
Does practicality, based on reason, know anything of fun? Again, highly doubtful.
Am I tired of worrying whether anything I do is based on pure reason, logic, and practicality? Most definitely.
Because I am at a point in my life where, should a particular Time-Lord-ish character materialize in this real-world life, with that glorious blue box of his, and offer to take me on an adventure, I'd say, "Oh, hell, yes!"
Because I am tired of trying to measure up to other people's expectations of me, and therefore beat my own psyche to a pulp trying to please them.
While I might link to my other blogs, which are more geared towards earning some dough, this blog is likely not going to have much to do with those other blogs, unless the posts are fun!
Of course, things like Tarot, astrology, and any other ways I geek out are fun for me. I'm a regular "Hermione Granger."
But sometimes I think I get too serious even about the things I find fun! I end up worrying too much about whether I'm "doing something right" and let the fun of what I love doing slip right through my fingers. And I can just hear Ron Weasley say, quite rightly, "Mental, that one! I'm tellin' ya!"
Which is rather odd, because later on in the "Harry Potter" movies, Hermione's patronus is an otter! And even if you don't know the deeper animal symbology, you can't help but associate otters with fun and cuteness overall. I mean, reputedly, these little creatures hold hands.. er...paws, when sleeping, so they don't drift away from each other. How can you not love such adorableness?
So, the fact that Hermione's patronus is an otter is telling of just how playful she needs to be, in order to balance out her seriousness.
And otter has been showing up in my animal cards lately, so I figured I'd best pay attention and remember to loosen the heck up already. To be truthful, I associate "Mary Poppins" with otters. You know, that whole "Spoonful of Sugar Makes the Medicine Go Down" concept. I think if they made an entirely animated version of that movie, like Disney did with "Robin Hood", they need to draw Mary Poppins as an otter. I would so. Totally. WATCH THAT! :-D
The fact I have spent the last three paragraphs talking about the lovely creatures is telling me something.
Another reason I created this blog is that I was inspired by a character in a show I've been rewatching on Hulu. I got to thinking that while writing the blogs I have set up to make some dough are great, I really need to have a place where I can just talk as though I'm talking to a best friend.
Problem is, while I really wanted to get a regular paper journal for doing just that: writing everything that happens in my life--just a fun "spill-the-beans" kind of journal, I found absolutely zero journals either at Wally-world or at Books-a-Million that had enough pages for a low enough price with a cover I really liked for sure. And paper journals, while classy-looking and fun (I was eyeing the ones that had to do with France, I confess), end up being filled completely at some point, and I just don't have the space to store used-up journals. To say nothing of the fact that when the thoughts come pouring out, my handwriting gets seriously messy. Messy to the point of me not being able to read my own writing, which really, really bites. :P
Plus, with paper journals, you can't upload videos to them like you can with electronic media. :-) And if my heart has her way, I know which videos she'd want to post first, because the videos in question have to do with France...and a particular character from that country...a character whom I have loved since the musical came into my life 22 years ago, thanks to Andrew Lloyd Webber--and my dad, who bought the tapes for me for my birthday. He's a character I've actually dreamed about, going down into his subterranean home and telling him precisely three words...I bet you can guess what those words are.
And while I know the difference between fact and fantasy, my heart doesn't seem to care if he's fictional...my heart only knows what she feels...my heart only knows what she resonates with. My heart only knows a kindred soul when she meets one, however fictional he happens to be.
And because of those more or less heartfelt feelings...it goes back to that quote by Blaise Pascal I mentioned at the very beginning of this post:
"The heart has its reasons, of which reason knows nothing."
Which is why I've got three fan-fic stories going and I've got a splendid idea for a fourth!
I'm 37, and I am writing these words as if I'm a teenager again.
But on some level, I'm still that fifteen or sixteen-year-old girl who is longing for a companion *other* than her parents. One might say I have some issues, but then...do I? Especially if one also considers the words of the late, great Madeleine L'Engle, who once said that getting older is not really quite so bad, since you're still all the ages you've ever been.
Yet that's the thing...I don't feel any older than maybe 25 or so, at the oldest. 1978, the year I was born, just doesn't seem that far away, really. Not when you contemplate the age of our solar system, to say nothing of the age of the universe itself. It makes this lifetime--and all the other lifetimes before this one--look like the blips of Earthly existence that they are. Being an old soul like I am is paradoxical like that. It can make a person feel both quite old and quite young at the same time.
And yes...I have fun thinking of things like that.
Pax Felinum (Peace of the Cat),
Kat ^.^
"The heart has its reasons, of which reason knows nothing." -- Blaise Pascal.
I would have written that in the original French, but since it is not likely many folks who see this post would be able to read the language, I still would have had to provide a translation...so what would have been the point, other than I simply like to read stuff in languages other than my native English? :P
For fun, you ask? Yeah, pretty much.
Does reason know anything of fun? I'm beginning to doubt that.
Does practicality, based on reason, know anything of fun? Again, highly doubtful.
Am I tired of worrying whether anything I do is based on pure reason, logic, and practicality? Most definitely.
Because I am at a point in my life where, should a particular Time-Lord-ish character materialize in this real-world life, with that glorious blue box of his, and offer to take me on an adventure, I'd say, "Oh, hell, yes!"
Because I am tired of trying to measure up to other people's expectations of me, and therefore beat my own psyche to a pulp trying to please them.
While I might link to my other blogs, which are more geared towards earning some dough, this blog is likely not going to have much to do with those other blogs, unless the posts are fun!
Of course, things like Tarot, astrology, and any other ways I geek out are fun for me. I'm a regular "Hermione Granger."
But sometimes I think I get too serious even about the things I find fun! I end up worrying too much about whether I'm "doing something right" and let the fun of what I love doing slip right through my fingers. And I can just hear Ron Weasley say, quite rightly, "Mental, that one! I'm tellin' ya!"
Which is rather odd, because later on in the "Harry Potter" movies, Hermione's patronus is an otter! And even if you don't know the deeper animal symbology, you can't help but associate otters with fun and cuteness overall. I mean, reputedly, these little creatures hold hands.. er...paws, when sleeping, so they don't drift away from each other. How can you not love such adorableness?
So, the fact that Hermione's patronus is an otter is telling of just how playful she needs to be, in order to balance out her seriousness.
And otter has been showing up in my animal cards lately, so I figured I'd best pay attention and remember to loosen the heck up already. To be truthful, I associate "Mary Poppins" with otters. You know, that whole "Spoonful of Sugar Makes the Medicine Go Down" concept. I think if they made an entirely animated version of that movie, like Disney did with "Robin Hood", they need to draw Mary Poppins as an otter. I would so. Totally. WATCH THAT! :-D
The fact I have spent the last three paragraphs talking about the lovely creatures is telling me something.
Another reason I created this blog is that I was inspired by a character in a show I've been rewatching on Hulu. I got to thinking that while writing the blogs I have set up to make some dough are great, I really need to have a place where I can just talk as though I'm talking to a best friend.
Problem is, while I really wanted to get a regular paper journal for doing just that: writing everything that happens in my life--just a fun "spill-the-beans" kind of journal, I found absolutely zero journals either at Wally-world or at Books-a-Million that had enough pages for a low enough price with a cover I really liked for sure. And paper journals, while classy-looking and fun (I was eyeing the ones that had to do with France, I confess), end up being filled completely at some point, and I just don't have the space to store used-up journals. To say nothing of the fact that when the thoughts come pouring out, my handwriting gets seriously messy. Messy to the point of me not being able to read my own writing, which really, really bites. :P
Plus, with paper journals, you can't upload videos to them like you can with electronic media. :-) And if my heart has her way, I know which videos she'd want to post first, because the videos in question have to do with France...and a particular character from that country...a character whom I have loved since the musical came into my life 22 years ago, thanks to Andrew Lloyd Webber--and my dad, who bought the tapes for me for my birthday. He's a character I've actually dreamed about, going down into his subterranean home and telling him precisely three words...I bet you can guess what those words are.
And while I know the difference between fact and fantasy, my heart doesn't seem to care if he's fictional...my heart only knows what she feels...my heart only knows what she resonates with. My heart only knows a kindred soul when she meets one, however fictional he happens to be.
And because of those more or less heartfelt feelings...it goes back to that quote by Blaise Pascal I mentioned at the very beginning of this post:
"The heart has its reasons, of which reason knows nothing."
Which is why I've got three fan-fic stories going and I've got a splendid idea for a fourth!
I'm 37, and I am writing these words as if I'm a teenager again.
But on some level, I'm still that fifteen or sixteen-year-old girl who is longing for a companion *other* than her parents. One might say I have some issues, but then...do I? Especially if one also considers the words of the late, great Madeleine L'Engle, who once said that getting older is not really quite so bad, since you're still all the ages you've ever been.
Yet that's the thing...I don't feel any older than maybe 25 or so, at the oldest. 1978, the year I was born, just doesn't seem that far away, really. Not when you contemplate the age of our solar system, to say nothing of the age of the universe itself. It makes this lifetime--and all the other lifetimes before this one--look like the blips of Earthly existence that they are. Being an old soul like I am is paradoxical like that. It can make a person feel both quite old and quite young at the same time.
And yes...I have fun thinking of things like that.
Pax Felinum (Peace of the Cat),
Kat ^.^
This Is Another Test...
This blog is way too empty...
Way too much of an echo in here...
You could hear a pin drop...*ping*
...Yup...too empty...
Way too much of an echo in here...
You could hear a pin drop...*ping*
...Yup...too empty...
This is a Test...
This is a test of the awesome blog known as "Beyond the Notebook."
If this were an actual post, the text would be twice as silly, twice as fun, and maybe have a TARDIS land in the middle of it all, and a tall skinny man would pop out and say "Aww, I wanted to be ginger!"
If this were an actual post, the text would be twice as silly, twice as fun, and maybe have a TARDIS land in the middle of it all, and a tall skinny man would pop out and say "Aww, I wanted to be ginger!"
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)